Everything is related to your Twin Flame journey

As most of you probably know by now, I am involved in a yoga teacher training course. It's a 200 hr teacher training, and it is very intense. And I've found it overwhelming, especially over the past few weeks. On 11/17, I had my final practice teach, where I taught a one hour yoga class. It has taken a lot of time for me to fully process what happened that day, and to come to terms with it. But honestly, it just goes to show you that everything which happens in life is a spiritual lesson for you to move through. I went to yoga school that day feeling fear and anxiety. I had surrendered my practice teach to God, as I did for the first one, but it didn't work this time. I had so much fear and anxiety that I had digestive issues. On top of this, my body started preparing for my period, so my legs felt like jello. I had practiced this class probably just as much as I practiced for my initial practice teach. My fellow yogi students were very supportive. One even tried to coach me before it was my turn to teach. I was the very last student to teach that day.

It may help to give some background on the requirements for this final yoga practice teach. It had to be either 55 mins or 1 hr long, with the centering and breath practice about 5 mins in total, warm ups for 10 mins, postures for 30 mins, cool downs for 10 mins, savasana and closing about another 5 mins in total. There needed to be a theme, and BRFWA along with breath cues should be integrated throughout the practice. Even the music had specific requirements.

So I went up to the front of the room to teach. There are 9 other students in my class and two instructors. 3 students took the class. The other 5 just watched, and the instructors watched/critiqued. They would speak with me after to give me their review. I still felt nervous and I was drained. It showed in my voice in the beginning of my centering. And then I did my warm ups and froze. I felt embarrassed. As my practice progressed I became confused and didn't know if I was running on time or not. Also, the students weren't following my transitions from one pose to another at one point. Apparently my disdain showed through my facial expressions which I was completely unaware of.

When it ended, my fellow yoga students were again very supportive. Then I received the constructive criticism from my instructors. It was a valuable learning experience. Out of everything, they told me the biggest thing I needed to improve was my own self talk. I needed more positive self talk because I was being too hard on myself. Not only that, it was written all over my face. Of course there were other critiques as well. At one point while they were talking, the pressure I had put on myself got to me and I started crying. Tears were flowing. I honestly didn't know when I was going to stop crying.

It is said that your life purpose will bring up your biggest blocks in your twin flame journey as well. So what were mine? Fear of being seen, a need for things to be "perfect," and being too critical of myself and others. What I didn't realize until hours later is that during my practice teach I wasn't just embarrassed, but I felt exposed. This is the same feeling I felt when my entire office sensed that I had feelings for my twin flame whom I worked with, and that he had feelings for me. I had never properly faced that feeling or tried to heal it. So here it is, popping up again in another setting. Because God is perfect, and will bring up your blocks to heal. Be gentle with yourselves on your spiritual journey. Light and Love <3